Posted by: psychedchick | February 6, 2010

What if…

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 7; the seventh edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

Age 3 years , 9 months and 2 days: My first memory.

Baba came in drunk. Heard Aai and Baba fight. Baba hit Aai.

What if I had spoken up then?

Age 5 years, 1 month and 7 days: My first beating.

Baba came in drunk. Heard Aai and Baba fight. Baba hit Aai and then came after me.

What if I had spoken up then?

Age 7 years, 4 months and 3 days: My first abuse.

Uncle came home. He put his hand on my mouth and touched me. I bled.

What if I had spoken up then?

Age 9 years, 5 months and 5 days: My first burn.

Baba came home to find me reading. He took his bidi and burnt me. I had to learn cooking.

What if I had spoken up then?

Age 13 years, 2 months and 9 days: My first proposal

Aai got me all ready in a saree. I had to serve tea to a family. She told me I was to get married. I didn’t know that meant.

What if I had spoken up then?

Age 15 years, 5 months and 20 days: My first hope crushed.

I was married to a boy I had seen once before. Maybe this life would end. He came home drunk on our first night and beat me after having sex.

What if I had spoken up then?

Age 15 years, 11 months and 28 days: My first abortion.

I was pregnant for 3 months where they tested that my baby was a kill. They had her killed.

What if I had spoken up then?

Age 16 years, 10 months and 13 days: My first child.

I was pregnant again. This time with a boy. He lived. All the time I had with him was when I had to feed him. I wanted to be with him more.

What if I had spoken up then?

Age 17 years, 11 months and 15 days: My first girl

I was pregnant again. No testing this time. They already had a boy. I gave birth to a girl. Her father never asked to see her.

What if I had spoken up then?

Age 20 years, 7 months and 23 days: My girl’s first memory.

He came home drunk. He hit me. She watched.

What if I had spoken up then?

Age 22 years, 3 months and 1 day: My girl’s first beating.

He came home. He hit me and then lashed for her.

What if I had spoken up then?

Age 22 years, 3 months and 2 days: My first realisation.

My girl was living my life all over again.

I had to speak up now.

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.



  1. Loved your take on the topic!!!

    • Thanks πŸ™‚ I am glad I was able to do justice to the topic…

  2. Superb! Very innovative idea. You’ve used the title effectively. And at the same time, a very strong message.

    • I am glad that I could do justice to it!

  3. bold-touching-awesome.

  4. I am speachless… u have echoed the thoughts of probably 60% of Indian women out there… and u used the topic brilliantly there… hats off to u….

    Latest Blog Post: What if…

    • Wow! Thats a nice compliment!

  5. This was really really awesome! a wonderful take on the topic… keep up the good work πŸ™‚

    all the best for BATOM

    • Thanks a lot. Means a lot that you liked it!

  6. Touched.

    Very well written.

  7. this post some how have an effect. a chill, sadness, numb, don’t know wut the feel is. but there is a feel for sure. good one!

    • I hope it isnt numbness. I hope that it springs people into action. I hope I brought out what she feels so that next time people can help her find a voice!

  8. damn! that gave me the shivers!! oh an awesome write babes

  9. wow! a new way of presenting your thoughts, i like it!

  10. Serious take on a serious issue… I will highlight this post and base one of my future posts on this issue, which I feel needs to be properly addressed by the society… Thanks…

    • Thanks a lot. It is nice to see men agree on this. I understand not all men are the same and people who do such things are just not normal. But when I read such comments, it reminds me that there is hope!

  11. that is…errrrmmmm….. tell me frankly i hope its not ur story or anything,….

    if its only fiction….AWESOME.

    if its inspired…pls call cops, get those bastard in jail to rot…or leave them on the street…:(

    • This is the story of many a women in India. I try to help them whenever I can. It aint helpful if I stand up to them but I can help these women find their voices sooner πŸ™‚

  12. Total justice done to the title! What a post! Totally loved the way you have voiced it! It conveyed the message and how! Glad that I stumbled upon this one! Good luck with BATOM πŸ™‚

    • I am glad you stumbled upon it too!

  13. innovative and very creative, loved your style, it was a very good read…

  14. Wow! really liked your style….women will find their voice …soon…high time world changed…nice writing!!

    • Sigh. I hope they find it soon πŸ˜€

  15. What a way to tell the woebegone tale of many women and their plight in India even till date!
    Best ‘What If’ entry by far…
    All the best for BATOM

    • Thanks so much for the compliment! It means a lot that even one person thought that πŸ˜€

  16. awesome post..

    touching and apt for the topic..

    all the best for the BAT

    • Thanks for the comment and wishes!

  17. a different what if
    and true sometimes
    good luck

  18. Kudos.. othr thn the issue u raised here, what i liked is the way u prsntd it.. same thing wud hav been told in a vry monotous way nd hence wud have ended up 2 b jus anothr social issue write up.. bt the way u hav prsntd it does not only make one appreciate ur though process and the way u execute it but also the issue u raise here.. keep adding sch dimensions to blog-a-ton πŸ™‚

    • Thanks a lot. Unless stories have an impact, the message will get lost. People need to be woken up from a slumber. Thanks a lot.

  19. Wow……u know na girl ur amazing always πŸ™‚ loved it πŸ™‚

  20. Awesome!

  21. I LOVED THIS! Great job! I’m envious!

  22. Sorry for my late response, my site was hacked..

    That’s a compelling post with that hard hitting What-if leitmotif. Beautiful, very well done and has a very nice message. Reminded me of ‘A Thousand Splendid Suns’. We need more of these.. πŸ™‚

    • Wow that is one hell of a compliment. Thanks a lot! I mean it! The comparison floored me.

  23. Goood.Just so soooooooooooo goood.Thats one big POW!I love it,and how!

  24. Very well handled…..and I am very glad too see such a topic being highlighted……if only something can be done……………………………………

    • A lot can be done but the most important thing is to ask people to speak up against it!

  25. what if …. more chunk of women can think about it…and then ACT as well

    good job lady!

    • I hope a lot of people can ACT!

  26. The best post I have read so far!! I loved the narration so much! Gud luck to u!

    • Thanks a lot πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

  27. Such a sad and painful story told in such a simple and beautiful way… awesome…
    A very good post highlighting the plight of female children that sadly still exists in many parts of India…

    • I hope slowly we can get rid of it..Slowly but surely!

  28. that is the life cycle of most of the women here.. it is unfortunate .. you have captured it very well.. thanks for using blog to spread the right message.

    • I hope I could get the word around! It makes me feel so helpless!

  29. Wonderful…So good..Just the minimal usage of words and yet soo many feelings conveyed..Too good..
    Also, I liked the template..very much..I have the same one too..:)

    • I like the simplicity of this template too πŸ™‚ Thanks for the comment!

  30. Wonderful…..really well written!!

  31. gave me goosebumps! really nicely done…:)

    • πŸ˜€ I am unsure if I should be happy about it!

  32. Very creative & the end was unexpected. Good job πŸ™‚

    • Thanks for the visit and the comment πŸ˜€

  33. A different take on the topic with a very common issue..
    well done…
    All the best for BATOM 7!!

    • Thanks a lot for yr wishes and the comment!

  34. Hi…

    Am standing and clapping for exploring the much happening social malice in this so called land of karma bhoomi and veda bhoomi ….

    Stupendous and quite rationally objective ……
    kudos to you…..
    great idea and perfect presentation…..
    simple, straight but still impacting a ton …..
    queer narration…..
    did hit the bulls eye….
    no second thoughts …..
    quite original and innovative …..
    keep up the great work and keep exploring the social arena …..

    As of now your post is the top contender in my voting list …
    need to say more ?

    all the best ….
    πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚

    • Yay! Your comment made me feel so damn happy! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ Thanks for the vote! πŸ˜€

  35. Amazing.. short, beautiful and strong!! Such a wonderful take.. I do not have enough words to explain.. I wish everyone would understand the agony of these women. Cheers to u for putting a feather in the cap. Best of luck.

    • Thanks a lot! I am glad you liked it1

  36. I dont think any one can handle anything like this better than what you did…brilliant piece of work

    PS: my first time on ur blog…loved it!!

    • Thanks a lot and welcome to the blog. Hope you keep coming! πŸ™‚

  37. Hai!!

    A message told in a simple way that left a strong impact.
    Its time women speak and learn to say NO.

    :~) good work!

  38. ouch…ouch…ouch…what if i had spoken then???

    dam rash..

    i loved it…

    • I hope many women find their voices!

  39. OH. MY. GOD!

    I’m speechless, lost in a maze of What If’s…. Still recovering from the impact this post had on me…. One of your best ones ever i would say….

    You write too good girl!! I’m toh deffo voting for this one πŸ™‚

    Good job…. πŸ˜€

    • Thank you for the vote, the comment and the visit πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

  40. Wonderfully written. It reminded me of the movie Chandani Bar though the plot line is slightly different but it also showed how the protagonist of the movie saw her daughter relive her (protagonist’s) life.

    • I haven’t watched that movie yet. Maybe now, I should!

  41. This is awesome stuff. I found you from Leticia’s post of FB. She was a colleague πŸ™‚ great stuff and keep it up.

    • Thanks a lot. It needed to be said!

  42. It’s a beautiful post that captures the trauma and feeling a girl/woman go through/went through. I the likes.

    • Me the likes the comment and the fact the youse make to me blog!

  43. Wow. That blew me away. It’s all in a circle.

    • Yes. Unfortunately or fortunately, only we can stop this circle! Thanks!

  44. I didnt quite like it…I didnt quite enjoy reading it…

    and that’s exactly why I liked it. ! Congrats and well deserved.

    • Err..Thanks I guess πŸ˜€

  45. Congratulations Rashi!! Truly deserving win!! πŸ™‚
    Amazing take on the topic and very well executed!!
    Cheers πŸ™‚

    • Thanks a lot for the visit and the comment!

  46. I couldnt quite like the flow…I didnt quite enjoy reading it…

    it was too vivid, …it was too close to reality….

    and that’s exactly why I liked it. ! Congrats and well deserved.

  47. You totally deserve the win! I din vote this time, but I guess if I did, it’d have to be you!


  48. I am just awestruck. Because of writers like you, Bloggers can make a difference in this society. Kudos to you and keep up the good work. And congrats for winning the Blog a ton Batom. Cheers! πŸ™‚

    • Words will always be mighter than the sword, isnt it?

      Thanks πŸ™‚

  49. Congras on the Win Rashi!!! Keep writting! Btw u were a part of my final 2 shortlists for the vote! πŸ™‚

    Latest Blog Post: Jab We Met…

  50. WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    wot a piece of writing…
    full of feelings…
    very well presented….

    Hats Off to you!!!!

    n ya congratzz lady… for winning.. BATOM-7

    keep Writing..

  51. Hi… That was amazing. We could really relate to the current situation in India now. I read it after I saw you win BLOG-A-Ton7… BTW, Congrats. I love your writing.. Do keep writing.. I’m blogrolling ya… C ya

    • Thanks for the visit, the comment and the blog roll. Hope to see you around! πŸ˜€

  52. Hi ….


    You know i voted for you at “12 Feb 2010 22:00:00” ….. exactly the last minute and i almost ran from my class at 9.30 to make it before 10 ……. didnt get a cabin in net cafe til 9.45…..and finally am in.
    After writing a lengthy comment, the system got struck, at 9.57….. God….. restarted…..2 mins….opened blog a ton……1 min…. commenting…..its exactly 10…..submit comment …… done.

    Hmmm….am glad that my vote did made the tilt…. πŸ™‚

    Keep Going….

    Mahesh Kalaal

    • Ah! The man who made the difference. Thanks a lot for your vote and rushing just in time to cast your vote! Means a lot! Thanks thanks πŸ˜€

  53. Its was a nice story. πŸ™‚
    Anyways, congrats for winning BAT-7!

  54. Splendid… I had goosebumps.. wow..nicely written…

    • Ah thanks πŸ™‚ Goosebumps in such cases are good, I suppose!

  55. Very well written, loved it. SUPER! =)
    And now, I want you to write a guest post for me. (Though, I know my blog is not worth writing!) By the way, can I actually use this post on my blog with PROPER credits to you? LOVED IT LIKE ANYTHING! πŸ™‚

  56. that is so brillianly written… expressed so well…
    congratz on the win…

  57. damn!!that was great…brilliant…!you seem to know how to bring about ‘perfect endings’

    • I wouldn’t know if that was perfect. I hope so!

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